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Affirmation: I can live alone without feeling lonely.

Writer's picture: Jesse La VancherJesse La Vancher



I understand what it means to feel lonely. It's a hollow ache, a sense of disconnection, a longing for companionship. I also know what it is like to live alone—the quiet of an empty house, the independence of making my own schedule. However, living alone and being lonely are not the same things. I no longer confuse living alone with feeling lonely. Living alone is a circumstance; loneliness is a feeling. I can manage my circumstances and influence my feelings.


In the past, loneliness consumed me when I was by myself. It was a constant companion, whispering doubts and fears. Now, I know that I can live alone and feel secure. I am building a foundation of self-sufficiency and inner peace. Although fleeting feelings of loneliness might come to me, like clouds passing across the sun, they leave as quickly as they arose. I recognize them as temporary visitors, not permanent residents of my mind.

When I live alone, I am able to delight in all my choices. This is my domain, my personal kingdom. I can do what I want to do when I want to do it. I can decorate as I please, creating a space that reflects my personality and nurtures my soul. I can even cook, eat, and go shopping whenever the mood strikes me, free from the constraints of others' schedules or preferences. This autonomy is a gift, a chance to truly be myself.


When I live alone, I can enjoy the peacefulness and serenity that surrounds me. In the quiet of my own space, I can truly hear myself think. I can read a novel or listen to my favorite music on my own schedule, without interruption. I can meditate, practice yoga, or simply sit in quiet contemplation, recharging my inner batteries. This solitude is not emptiness; it is a space for self-discovery and rejuvenation.




My home is my sanctuary and place of safety. It is my shelter from the world, a refuge from the stresses and demands of daily life. In my own space, I am surrounded by all the special possessions that feel familiar and comforting—photos of loved ones, treasured books, cozy blankets. Being in my home alone settles my soul. It is a place where I can truly relax and be myself, without pretense or performance.


Today, I strive to feel totally safe and secure when I am alone in my home. I choose to take joy in all of the experiences available to me when I am in my home by myself. I cultivate a sense of self-love and acceptance, recognizing that my own company is valuable and enriching.


Tips and Tricks for Embracing Solitude:

  • Create a welcoming environment: Decorate your space with things you love. Use colors, textures, and scents that evoke positive feelings.

  • Establish routines: Having a structure to your day can provide a sense of stability and purpose, even when you're alone.

  • Engage in hobbies: Pursue activities that you enjoy, whether it's reading, painting, playing music, or gardening. This provides a focus and a sense of accomplishment.

  • Connect with others intentionally: Schedule regular calls or video chats with friends and family. Join online communities or groups with shared interests.

  • Practice self-care: Prioritize activities that nourish your mind, body, and soul, such as taking baths, exercising, or meditating.

  • Limit social media consumption: Excessive social media use can exacerbate feelings of loneliness by creating unrealistic comparisons and a sense of FOMO (fear of missing out).

  • Embrace the quiet: Learn to appreciate the stillness and silence of being alone. Use this time for reflection, introspection, and self-discovery.

  • Challenge negative thoughts: When feelings of loneliness arise, challenge the negative thoughts that accompany them. Remind yourself of the positive aspects of being alone and the opportunities it provides.


Self-Reflection Questions:

  1. How have I confused living alone with loneliness? What specific thoughts or beliefs have contributed to this confusion?

  2. Do I consciously design my space in ways that bring joy and security to me? What changes can I make to enhance the comfort and positive energy of my home?

  3. Are there areas of my home that make me feel uncomfortable? If so, what can I do to banish such feelings and change those areas of my home? Consider decluttering, rearranging furniture, or adding new décor.

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